Help spread the word about Metastatic Breast Cancer!
We need more for Stage IV.
Mary’s Story - Updated 11/27/24
We are sorry to announce Mary passed away November 27th. Her spirit will not be forgotten.
Her obituary is copied below.
“My story began in January of 2012 when I was diagnosed with breast cancer. It was a day I’ll never forget – the January chill felt just a bit cooler. I then underwent the expected lumpectomy surgery, chemotherapy and radiation.
For nine months of my life, I endured sickness, nausea and fought not for survival – for the gravitas of the situation hadn’t quite become real – but for
just a normal day, a day without sickness, anxiety and fear. I endured.
Fast forward to June 2014, almost two years after my last radiation treatment I received a call I had been subconsciously dreading, a call I’d hoped I’d never ever get.
The breast cancer had metastasized, spread to my bones. “Metastatic breast cancer is incurable,” was the only thing I remember from that day. Now the real fight had begun. I had a terminal diagnosis. Terminal.
A terminal cancer diagnosis such as metastatic breast cancer (MBC) is emotionally challenging, but is also physically draining. So I decided to focus my days doing something that I loved. I am swimming across as many lakes as possible bringing awareness and funding to metastatic breast cancer—a poorly funded and all but forgotten branch of a deadly disease.
I swim for the all the other 150,000-250,000 women and men who have metastatic-stage IV breast cancer.”
– Mary
What is metastatic breast cancer?
Metastatic breast cancer (MBC, also know as Stage IV) is breast cancer that has spread beyond the breast to other organs in the body (most often the bones, lungs, liver or brain). No one dies from cancer in the breast; deaths are due to metastasis to other parts of the body. Once breast cancer has metastasized it is a terminal disease – THERE IS NO CURE.
Why we need your help?
For decades funding focused on prevention, awareness, and early detection.
Unfortunately early detection and subsequent treatments do not guarantee a cure. Metastatic breast cancer can occur 5, 10 or many years after a person’s original diagnosis. Less than 10% of all breast cancer research dollars goes towards Stage IV.
There has been no significant reduction in annual deaths from Metastatic Breast Cancer
Remembering Mary Gooze
June 4, 1951 – November 27, 2024
Mary was an inspiration to all and will be missed by family, friends and the entire community.
Mary Gooze, a wonderful mom, grandmother, wife, teacher, cancer advocate, and swimmer extraordinaire passed away on November 27 after a 13-year battle with Stage IV breast cancer. Mary loved reading a good obituary, so hopefully this passes muster.
Mary was the middle of three girls, born in Western Michigan in 1951 to Clayton and Kathryn Wilson. Her dad was superintendent of schools and mom was a teacher. Mary was brought up with a love of learning and books, and a passion for teaching. After graduating from Western Michigan University, she began her elementary education career in Adrian, Michigan.
While getting a master’s degree at Eastern Michigan, Mary joined a friend whose husband played on an intramural basketball team at the University of Michigan.
One day, the friend’s husband had a job interview, so asked his classmate, Rob Gooze, to substitute for him.
After much flirting on the court, Rob won Mary’s heart (mostly because he could cook and Mary didn’t know her way around a kitchen). They were married in Ann Arbor in August 1978. After a short stint working in the San Francisco Bay area, the Goozes moved to Oregon, Wisconsin where Mary taught elementary and middle school English and Social Studies for 30 years. Thus, the halo above her head for teaching those grades. (We hope this obituary meets her grammar requirements.)
Mary and Rob enjoyed raising their three children, numerous dogs, cats, rabbits and even two goats. Mary continuously pushed boundaries, enjoying rock climbing, rafting, horseback riding and mountain climbing, and competing in numerous triathlons, where she often medaled. But was disappointed to not be chosen for “The Amazing Race.” The year Mary turned 60, she created a to-do list of 60 activities (physical, mental, musical, educational) to complete that year and was featured in a front-page article in the Wisconsin State Journal. (She did, in fact, complete all of them, including reading 6,000 pages and doing 60 pushups at once.)
Mary and Rob also had a love of adventure travel and visited more than 50 countries and much of the USA. Favorites were a walking safari in Zambia, rafting 220 miles of the Grand Canyon, and a small ship cruise to Antarctica. Since their son David was in the Peace Corps, they spent 4 days in a remote village in Togo, West Africa, where Mary got to experience brushing lizards away before using the pit toilets.
Although somewhat of an introvert, Mary joined Oregon Straw Hat Players in 1981; her involvement inspired her children to perform in numerous musicals. Though she never made the Broadway Stage, Mary and Rob enjoyed the theater in NYC, Chicago or at American Players Theater, where they were patrons for more than 40 years.
Mary always had a love of books and participated in two book clubs. While homebound during COVID, she created a Zoom poetry community that is still going strong today. The kids could never beat her in scrabble or Wordle.
In January 2012, Mary was diagnosed with invasive breast cancer which shortly metastasized to her bones and liver and four years ago to her brain. This diagnosis did not dampen her spirit but made her angry that so few people knew about stage IV and that so little research funding was focused on extending the lives of those with metastatic breast cancer (MBC). Mary was featured on numerous TV stations for her advocacy through swimming events, die-ins at the State Capitol and meetings with numerous legislators at both the federal and state level.
Though the cancer prevented Mary from continuing to run and bike and climb, she quickly took to swimming, and used her long swims – tough feats for even the best athletes – in lakes around the world to raise awareness for MBC. The campaign, onewomanmanylakes.org, has raised over $2.6 million for MBC since “Research is our Best Hope!”
Mary was predeceased by her parents, Clayton and Kathryn Wilson and sister Kathy. She is survived by her husband Rob, children Aaron (Gillian) of Seattle, Margaret (Brian) of Cottage Grove, WI and David (Alex) of Concord, NH along with three grandchildren, Amali, Ezra, Luna, and sister Susan (Jim) Gilmore of Tecumseh, MI.
A private Jewish graveside service, officiated by Rabbi Jon Prosnit, will take place at the Farley Center Natural Path Sanctuary in Verona. There will be a Celebration of Life next summer. Of course, by a lake, swimming encouraged. In the Jewish tradition, we do not send flowers but instead the family requests donations in Mary’s memory go to her More For Stage IV Fund at the UW Carbone Cancer Center.
9 Things Not to Say to Someone
Diagnosed With MBC
If you’re like me, you like concrete how-tos, clear directions, tried and true recipes, do this-not that, that sort of thing. I want to know specifically how to be a good friend to those with MBC.
Lacking a map, I’ve decided to simply ask… The women I talked to were very happy to help me and now I have for you (and me) this list.